Not on a blog roll

I've been scouring other blogs lately. One in particular that I cannot stop reading. I mean really, I've been reading her archives that go all the way back to 2001. Heather, over at dooce.com is a genius. When I grow up I want to be just like her.

I've made bad generalizations in my head about other bloggers, and about what I want my blog to be about. I want it to be about my wedding. About picking a cake (done) a venue (done) and a man (DONE with a capital D) . But I want it to be funny, and poignant and a little brash. I'd like it to reflect me and my personality, and not just fit in with the wedding-centric blogs.

As you can tell, I'm having a bit of a blog personality crisis.

So, maybe we can start over here at Becoming Dee. Hi, I'm Stefanie. I'm 23. I'm scared crapless about having a horrible wedding, but I cannot wait to be married to Mike. Things aren't always white and fluffy and roses and romantic comedies. Things are hard. I have a really tough time transitioning myself from day to day projects, to simple tasks and back again. Lately I've been in a rough phase in my life. I'm getting too involved in planning the wedding and not involved in the other day-to-day things going on around me. I need a reality check. I need someone to poke me in the forehead and say "Hello, wake up, life goes on after your wedding and YOU SHOULDN'T SPEND ALL OF YOUR AWAKE HOURS TRYING TO CONTROL EVERY ASPECT OF IT."

And that's true. I tend to be a control freak. Only about certain things though. Like how the towels are folded and put away, or how I have to call the rental company today to ask them about every question on the face of the earth that I have. What size are the rectangular tables, and what linens are there available and can you please put me out of my misery because who thought that I would be the girl who wonders about table freaking sizes and the color of the freaking linens.

Like I said in my previous post, I have no inspiration right now. I've been planning the wedding for year now and we still have seven months to go. Seven months and six days. But who is counting?

Here is a little list of what has been done recently.
- Cake picked out and tasted. Deposit and contract on the way over tomorrow
- Save the Dates sent out. Getting lots of e-mail from people who said they loved them (and who also noted how UNCREATIVE I am, and how did I ever come out of my moms womb because she kicked ass all over those little buggers).
- Food tasting all set up. We're going on 4/20, so it's a good day to have the munchies. I kid, I kid.
- Don't get me started on the rentals, but those are out there somewhere too. In daddy Cook's la-la land of "How much is this costing me again"?