This morning, as is all mornings I took Charlotte to "school" (daycare)and it was a nightmare. Not only do I have to get myself looking somewhat composed and ready for the work day I have to get my kid looking half way like her parents don't keep her in a dog cage.
I walk in her room and switch on the light and say "time to get up" in a cheerful voice and she just stared at me. Stared me down like I had just offended her to high heavens. Then I went over to her crib to get her out and she moved to the other end of it, like as far away from me as she could get, and took her blanket and Shamu with her. She was not feeling this morning, and I wanted to be all "that's cool dude, lets both go back to sleep" but the truth is more befitting so I really had to say "dude, I don't want to do this either, but lets work it out". So we did. I grabbed her out of her crib, she launched her pacifier across the room. Rad. I lay her down on the changing table and try to put on her clothes for the day, her arm gets stuck (per usual) and she screams. I'm not even dealing with socks and shoes today, so I throw them in her bag for school. That was a fun five minutes.
Now my morning routine is to get myself up early and all ready for the day, and then do the same with Charlotte. She eats breakfast at school so I get her bag ready with blanket, socks and shoes, long sleeve shirt (because her daycare is a fucking ice box), paci and cup. But there was no cup to be found. And that pacifier that she launched across the room was now being eaten by my dog. Side note: Pacifiers are the devil. I'm not talking in terms of a comfort item or eventually having to wean, I'm talking more like where the fuck do they all go? I've purchased 4 new ones in the past 3 months or so. We're down to one. The new ones that I bought a few weeks ago are already gone. Oh, OH...don't even get me started on the little plastic insert that goes in the sippy area of the sippy cup. Aye.
So now we are at like T-minus like 4 seconds before we need to walk out the door. A I took the paci back from my dog and ran it under the water for a few seconds. Don't look at my blog like that, at least I ran it under the water. You don't want to know what happens when she drops it in public places. Found a sippy cup under the couch (how?) but milk stained so I had to wash that. Good to go. I've got my kid, her backpack with the essentials, car, car seat, keys.
Hop in the car, start down the street, forgot to feed Ollie. Do I go back or let her starve until my husband gets home around 3 pm? I gotta feed her. Head home, feed the dog, now I have to wait for her to eat (forever), and let her out to go potty (forever). Now I'm running late.
Dogs taken care of, we're back in the car. Daycare is only about 10 minutes away so its a quick ride and we get there unharmed. I sign in, she screams as I hand her over. Here is the most worst part: the car seat. We have a ginormous car seat. It's a pain in the ass and it is heavy and because Mike picks her up I have to leave it there every morning. So I haul this thing out of my car to open the door to the daycare and the woman who is sitting right inside just looks at me while I'm doing this. She didn't help at all. On the road to work and actually sort of relieved.
Long story long. You may think that this is a crazy ass story but this is my every morning. It is insane.
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